So, you now have a baby and try as you might you cannot put him down. I know (for the ladies who may be reading) you are thinking it has to do with cleanliness because the floor might be dirty, or maybe a bonding thing... but you would be wrong. The reason us guys can't put down our baby is simply that it drives you gals crazy. You see when a guy is holding a baby suddenly 35 extra pounds simply melt off of him, his receding hair line is now as full as Fabio's, and the fact that he still may live in his mother's basement doesn't seem to matter at all. You see, he is holding a BABY!!!
I know when my wife and I are fighting all I need to do is pick up the kid and say "look dear, he has your cute chin."
"Ahhhh, you really think so?" She will say, "I kind of think it looks like aunt so and so or..."
Crisis adverted!
What does this lead to? Well, it leads to doing everything one handed.
Here is a little advice for the newly turned dad.
Pushing a shopping cart one handed is extremely hard, especially if you are on your phone, so remember a kid in the cart is worth one in the hand.
Only eat things that can be licked off of a forehead.
Don't eat things things in liquid that will run into your child's eyes, like cereal.
Neglect is not cool, if it is putting your child in danger all your charm is lost. You can put the kid down if needed.
So, for you dads to be, get practicing and we will see you out there... one handed!
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